Scheduling
I am not good at schedules. At least self imposed schedules or tasks. You give me a deadline and I will do it. If I give me a deadline, I might do it.
As we get back in the grove of our normal life I find myself craving a schedule. Mostly I think I want something to anchor me, something to help me anchor my children. I’ve never really had a schedule, or stuck to one, at least for long. I suppose I’m good at getting up and feeding my family at specific times of the day, and having the girls go to bed at certain times, but that’s it, and even Jon and I have disagreements about when they should go to bed since we don’t always stick to a schedule. Some nights it’s 9 some nights it’s 9:30.
I think part of the reason I’m not good at sticking to a schedule is my home never had one growing up. It wasn’t for lack of trying, but with six kids it can be hard to implement something and have us all follow through, especially when both parents work and weren’t there to supervise all the time.
In my house it was both a group effort and a fend for yourself environment. We all helped with dinner, though one person was assigned the main meal on a certain day of the week. (Mine was Wednesdayรย for a long time because I didn’t go to mutual or the youth activity, and yes I was cooking dinner before I was twelve.) The person in charge of dinner would then assign the different dinner assignments. One always wanted juice and vegetables because it was the easiest and then dishes was the least desirable. We worked together, but the goal was to get the easiest task possible.
I feel this has stuck with me. Try to accomplish what you need to the easiest way possible.
It was that way at home and it was that way at school.
So now that I’m a mom and one of the two providers of my children’s education, I find that I need to change my mindset. Schedules should be empowering, not a struggle. I should help my children learn in whatever way necessary, not the easiest or the quickest.รย I should have my girls help me around the house more because in the end it will help me, even if it takes longer now.
So I’m asking for advice. What schedules work for you, or don’t work for you?
Jon’s told me to start out small. Do just one task and make it a habit and then after a week or two add something else. I think it will take me two years if I implement that to it’s fullest, but I think it is good advice.
If it helps, my goal in scheduling isn’t to fill every moment of my day, but to make time for the things I want to do and to limit my self indulging which takes away from my family. I find myself on the internet entirely too much, and sleeping too much also. Both are to avoid doing work, though sometimes I’m just tired.
I want to make time to have my girls help with making lunch, and make time for me to do things to improve me and work alongside of them as they do work too. Not just assign them to do things and go off and do what I want or need to do. So if Lilah is writing in her journal, I should be writing in mine, not blogging. ๐
So what schedules work for you? Both in keeping your house organized and your children occupied.
July 21st, 2009 at 12:49 pm
A while back I was feeling the same way. I was having a hard time deciding the best way to get things finished that I wanted/needed to get done. So I took a little time to sit down and write out a list called “Important to Me”. Once I knew what was most important to me to get done (not necessarily what other people thought I should do), I started thinking about the types of things they were and when would be the best time to do them.
Specifically, I’m a morning person. If something requires the expenditure of energy, I HAVE to do it before 1 pm. So I had things like errands, chores, and trips to the library slated for the morning hours. Things that I could do from my house (emails, calls, blogging, reading to the boys) were slated for the afternoon, when I knew that I’d need some relax time.
A hard thing for me has been slowing down the urge to multi-task. I’m trying to keep in mind that my boys will only be this young once…and I’m trying to be as present and accessible to them as is possible for me. My housework will wait, my friends might have to leave a message, and I might have to let a few things pass me by…but my boys and I will spend this time together. ๐
July 23rd, 2009 at 6:33 pm
I have the scheduling issue on my weekends. I agree with “nice niece”. Plan the important need to get done things for first thing in the morning. I find if I don’t get up and exercise, shower and get dressed to go out first thing on my weekends I don’t make it dressed and showered some days. Plus when I had the girls and even now the days goes on and things pop up and what I have planned to do later in the day will never happen. Example for you would be
Feed children
Dress children
Do an hour or 2 of school work
Have girls help with lunch
Errands
And whatever else you stay at home moms do. LOL
I also find if I get up and start cleaning then eat breakfast and then finish cleaning my house gets cleaned. When I get up turn on the TV or computer while I eat I never leave the TV and never clean.
First things first and then everything else.
I have a form we use at work called a 4-1-1(4 weeks 1 week at a time and 1 day at a time) that also might help you. I will bring a copy to Eden day and share with you how it works.
Good luck.