Is It Naptime Yet

So yesterday I packed up some junk things we don’t use anymore into our trunk to give to Carolyn for her work’s charity garage sale.

Today I woke up to my wonderful Eden asking for something to eat and Jon already being gone. I’m sure I was just too out of it when he went to give me my goodbye kiss and left me to sleep. I’m sorry dear.

I eventually got into my shower and the girls breakfast and us out the door.

We got to Carolyn’s work and after giving her the stuff the girls got their exercise by walking and running around the ramp and stairs that are outside her work. They make a square and are soo fun according the Lilah. We also had time to kill before meeting Anna and my mom at Sweet Tomato’s so it was perfect. After a few laps I asked about anyone needing to go potty and Eden did. Lilah waited in the foyer. Then Lilah had to go and Eden waited in the foyer.
I guess Eden was also singing because one of the women on the office, who loves my girls, came out and complemented Eden on her sweet singing voice. You could tell Eden loved the compliment.

We then went to Sweet Tomatoes and stuffed ourselves full of good food.

My mom took my girls in my car back to her house and I took her car to my doctor’s appointment, or the whole reason I went to Henderson in the first place.

It was an appointment with my dermatologist. Jon noticed one of my moles/ freckles looking abnormal on my arm and I figured I should go now since our deductible has been paid by the girl’s two incidents last year and July is when the fiscal year ends and we’d have to pay it down again.
She said it was good that I was watching the two moles on my arms, but they’re not suspicious enough to remove.
But one of the moles that was removed on my back appears to be coming back, or there is pigment in the scar, and since the cells were abnormal I have to get it sutured.

I really hate this.

These two post explain a little of what I’m went through two years ago when I had precancerous or abnormal cells.

I guess they removed all the abnormal cells, or precancerous cells, but they were pretty deep so their was a chance the mole might grow back, and since it appears to be doing that she has to remove a lot of skin or suture me and they’ll retest and hopefully they’re just abnormal and not melanoma cells. It’s right under my previously sutured area.

It really sucks.

I have the appointment for the end of May. Jon has two weeks off and it’ll be in the middle of the second week. I figure we deserve at least one week of vacation, or time to do stuff, and the second week we can relax at home  and he’ll be there to help me for the first few days since I won’t be able to lift anything heavy, bend over or stretch my back for four weeks.

My doctor says I appear to get pretty thick scars, which is no fun. So I’ll have two scars right by on another. I think I’ll have Jon take a picture so you can understand how beautiful it will be. Luckily they are on my back, but they’re on my shoulder so it’s not a pretty sight when I’m in a swim suit.

It also bites because I won’t be able to go swimming for four weeks, or until the stitches are removed. Which means we’ll have to delay swimming lessons for Lilah, and I won’t be able to go swimming at her birthday party.

I figure it’s better to do it now though, rather then the middle of the summer when it’s the hottest and after we’ve already gone swimming.

It really saddens me to have these abnormal moles.

I have a lot of freckles and moles and as I more closely inspected my spotted back this morning I began to hate what I saw.
Instead of beautiful freckles that made me unique I saw potentially deadly cells that would eventually be taken off and leave by body scarred and ugly.

I know that not all of them will become harmful, but I’ve shown promising potential that they will. All three moles removed two years ago on my back were abnormal and two will leave large scars because of the depth of the cells in my skin. Every freckle and mole on me has the potential to change and become harmful.

I am grateful that I haven’t been diagnosed with melanoma. My doctor mentioned how once diagnosed you have to come in every three months to be checked out. I’m having a hard time with twice a year.

I hope the cells removed from me on the 28th are just abnormal.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 30th, 2008 at 5:22 pm and is filed under body, Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.