Blogging

My blogging has been very few and far between lately. There are a lot of different reasons for that.

One reason is Facebook. I spend a lot of time on there, and it’s easier to do quick little updates than to write a long blog. Something I hate that I’ve begun doing. I need to make more time for my blog, since I do see it more as my journal.

Another reason is we’ve been so busy. I don’t have time to sit and type out what’s been happening because we’ve been gone all day doing things, and then I come home to catch up on other blogs and Facebook, and then it’s dinner time and then I don’t want to do anything after dinner. On my days home, like today, I just want to clean, except I don’t want to clean at this moment, and get my house back into a more comfortable place, since it’s just been pretty chaotic lately with all we’ve been doing.

The final reason is I think I was a very grumpy mom for a very long time and since I was so grumpy and snappy, writing a blog about our life was one of the last things I wanted to do. I was unhappy and easily irritable. The girls were doing everything in their power to bother me, at least it felt that way, and I was always upset about something.

It wasn’t fun for anyone around here.

I’ve been more happy and less grumpy lately, but I honestly don’t know when or why I started being a more even tempered person. I don’t remember if it was a conscious choice, or if it was an unconscious choice that I’ve just consciously realized. I partially don’t remember because it was a while ago that I feel I became a more bearable person to live with.

I know my family was on pins and needles, wondering when and what would set me off that day. I know Jon tried to help make it so I was less stressed, and when he saw the chaos was getting to me, he would try to help and encourage the girls to also help. I also know that he never tried to interfere, or contradict me and my very strict parenting ways in front of the girls. We always talked about it later, which was hard since I have a hard time talking about parenting because I feel I am the dominant parent. ( It’s difficult when you’re with the children 24/7 and you might feel like your parenting techniques are better and should take precedent over the other parent who only has to deal with it on a more part time basis. )

I can be pretty stubborn.

So I’m not sure why I changed, or really why I was even so upset, but now things are a little better in the house. We still have our hard moments and I still get really upset, but it’s not as regular or frequent. I’m trying to deal with our disagreements with a more even temperament, but I’m still at a lost plenty of times at what to do to improve a certain behavior with the girls. We try to have more natural consequences, but sometimes their is no natural consequence and I don’t like to punish with chores or other things that I feel are just a part of being in the family.

Being a parent is hard, but I’m happy I have Jon as a companion to help me. As we navigate this road together he tries to support me and help me be better, and when I’m being stubborn and don’t want to change, he waits patiently. When he’s being stubborn I also try to wait patiently, since we both have our bad days.

I love you dear and am happy to be on this road with you.

2 Responses to “Blogging”

  1. Jonathan Blake Says:

    I love you, too. I wouldn’t want anyone else as my partner in life.

  2. andrea Says:

    You made fun of me once for being soppy about Brien, but I’ll take the high road and not say anything about that topic. 😉

    So I find that the more time I spend “plugged in” whether it be TV or computer the more grumpy I feel. So we’ve been turning off the electronics more often. I know that more things were going on then that with your girls. But I find that the best thing I can do when Z seems to be interfering with what I’m doing is to take a little time and give her the attention she’s trying to get. I’m not saying that, you are neglecting them. I don’t know all the details of what was going on. This is more a general comment. It’s good to hear that things are going better in your household.