Archive for August, 2006


The First of the Last

Monday, August 28th, 2006

Today is the first day of my last semester. Now it seems strange to say that. I know for the past 8 months I’ve been worried about school and it coming to an end but, as of today, I’m excited to say that I will be done in just a mere 15 weeks. It will have taken five and a half years. I write that out so it will be read and it will be clear. I want my last semester to go out with a bang. It’s my last chance to recover from last semesters madness and get awesome grades and my last opportunity to fell like I’ve learned something. okay. I know it sounds strange. I know half way through, and especially the final weeks, I will feel tired and worn down and I will want to put the minimal effort into completely my last semester of courses. I’m hoping that by writing this down, and having those of you who read this, my wonderful family and close friends, obviously those who care enough to bookmark and comeback anyways, help me and keep me to my word. Goals are more likely to be obtained if written down, and for me goals are more likely to be done if I have someone else to remind me, or at least to be proud of me when I accomplish them. (do I sound co-dependant or what?) Anyways. I’m hoping by writing it down this will give me the motivation to actually do it. I know I can do well. I just need to apply myself and stay on task.
One thing I hate about school is how much time it takes away from my kids
I admit, my children watch a little more TV during my school semesters, especially when I have tests approaching. I try to balance that with some quality time. Like we played outside this morning while it was still cool. The grass actually had dew on it. I haven’t experienced dew on our grass yet because of the heat, so it was a new thing and Lilah enjoyed it. I try to read and play with them in the afternoon before their nap, but there is plenty of time in the morning where they just entertain themselves, or the watch a movie or PBS. We also have a DVD of the best of the Electric company…at least then I feel like Lilah is learning something while being entertained.
Anyways. my schedule is as followed.
JOUR 101–Internet— it seems like there will be weekly assignments and lectures to watch..a little time intensive, but not bad.
CRJ 302—Internet—it’s a stats course for criminal justice. I am actually looking forward to it because I did well in my psy stats and I’d rather do hours of studying math, than hours of reading and writing this semester.
MUS 137- British invasion music of the 60’s– I believe it deals mostly with the Beatles. I’ll be taking this course Wednesday nights. I’m hoping it’s fun, so even if there is papers or hard work, at least it will be interesting.
CRJ 450- seminar on Sex offenders. I’ve never taken a seminar course. I imagine that it’s just like a regular course, but the content has not been approved as a course that should be given each semester. I find sex offenders interesting because they usually have sexual addictions, and it seems that everything goes in this world..until you break the law, or make someone else uncomfortable. I wanted at one time to be a criminal psychologist, but I decided it would probably take too much out of me as a mother, or really a woman.ร‚ย  Certain things just harden your spirit. I hope the course turns out to be interesting.
I’m looking forward to my semester..and to my graduation.

My tagline

Friday, August 25th, 2006

So as of today my tagline is: enjoyment is what happens when you let go of expectations.

I just wanted to write a little about why I’ve chosen that as this time. Now I as far as I know I came up with that thought, but it may have subconsciously come from somewhere else. I may have read or heard it, but I’m unsure where or from whom. All I know it that as I have let go of expectations I’ve been able to enjoy life a little more. Not that expectations are bad, but it’s when we set unrealistic expectations that they’re bad, plus we often set unrealistic expectations of others, and we can’t control them, so when they are not met, we can become disappointed. My prime example would be with Lilah. I was having such a hard time with her earlier this year. With my school, potty training, and her new opinion I just wasn’t happy and we were not always getting along. I’m sure overall I had fun with her, but the negative times and problems are what sticks out. I had high expectations of her. I felt she should understand her body well enough to go potty, but apparently she didn’t. I felt that she should be less demanding and better behaved, but she wasn’t. I wanted her to be the perfect child, so I didn’t enjoy her as much as I should have. Now as I try to let go of those expectations of her, and some of mine own as a mother, I am able to enjoy her. I am happier being at home with her. I let her throw her tantrums and I just try to ignore them. She sometimes pees in her panties, and gets very upset when it happens, but I try to stay calm….well calmer than I use to.

Like I said earlier expectations aren’t bad. Often they go hand in hand with goals. I’m trying to set realistic expectations of my children, husband, and self. That way I can have more joy in the accomplishments rather then the failures, and be pleasantly surprised when they exceed my expectations of them.

I suppose it’s just something I’ve learned, and is my little bit of wisdom at this time.

Ely Trip

Wednesday, August 23rd, 2006

Sorry this took so long to get up. Blogger was giving me trouble, though we think it’s really our internet provider, but I’ve decided to change who hosts my blog.

Enjoy.

So here are lots of pictures from our trip. I just love taking pictures.
We arrived Friday around 3. We just stayed and visited that night. We had delicious homemade pizza, and loved the company. Eden had her own room, except when Jack decided to wake her up. Jon and I slept in the living room on an air mattress and Lilah slept on couch cushions next to us. Somehow in the middle of the night Lilah completely turned around, luckily she was on the floor, and luckily Jon barely missed a foot to the head.

We had a wonderful Saturday. Brien and Andrea made us eggs, sausage, and toast. Lilah helped with the orange juice.

Andrea did Lilah’s hair.
This was just the second day so Lilah was still a little weary of Jack. (By Sunday she was playing fetch with him, and petting him without needing us there.)
Lilah picked the dandelions in the Park’s yard as we waited to get started.

We got out late and it took about an hour to get to Great Basin National Park.

Here’s Andrea’s and Brien on the road in front of us.
Here’s a view of what we saw as we drove.

We stopped at the visitors center to get info and rest. We bought some books, along with a DVD about Topaz camp, in which Jon’s grandfather helped built.

Lilah liked helping Eden walk around.

We drove to a picnic spot and then took a hike. We couldn’t go the full length so we walked just a little of it before we turned back.

Here’s Jon holding Eden…he’s a buff guy.
Here’s Brian getting some Indian rice grass for Lilah.

They spotted a lizard on the hike.
The Parks with Eden and Lilah at the end of the hike. The picture didn’t turn out well, but I wanted to post it anyways.
Us at the end of the hike, notice the rice grass Lilah had. She kept it until it Sunday, in which it started getting brittle and breaking.

We visited the Leman’s cave visitor center. Then we took a drive. We got to 10,000 elevation feet. We stopped at Mather Lookout and took some pictures. (Andrea you need to e-mail me the ones you have.)

I mostly got the view.

By this time it was 2 or so, so we decided to head back home so Brian and Andrea could make their dishes for the ward party, and we could shower.
It was a potluck dinner in which they held a dutch oven contest. If the food was in a dutch oven, they would judge it.
Andrea made my Dad’s famous baked beans. She came in first for main dishes.
Brien made some yummy potatoes. He said he sacrificed the bacon so his wife could come in first. He came in second for side dishes.

After we ate Lilah went and played at the playground.
While their the sprinklers decided to come on. It was only 6:45 pm or so….what park has sprinklers come on in the early evening? Crazy Ely.
After wearing a hat all day on the hike Eden decided to keep her pink hat on that Andrea and Brien gave her as a birthday gift.

We went to sacrament with them on Sunday. The boys and girls went home to make sure the turkey was done in time. I stayed all three hours because Andrea had to teach her Miamaids class. Jon said it was a full time job keeping Eden out of trouble. We had dog toys to keep out of her mouth, Jack to keep from licking her to death, and laptops to keep safe. At one point Eden had one of Jack’s toys and had climb into his little kennel.

The turkey was delicious. Jon took an Excedrin before we left for his headache, and to keep him awake while he drove home.

I’m not sure when we left but we got home around 6:30. At Alamo I went into the back seat. Eden wanted the company. It sure was nice to have Carolyn on the last trip. I realized if she hadn’t been back there it would have gone a little more like this one, with whining and some crying for attention.

All in all, it was tons of fun. I loved seeing my sister and her husband. It was a beautiful day at a national park and lots of good food. I highly recommend Ely, as long as you visit the Park’s.

Flying solo

Tuesday, August 22nd, 2006

So today is my first day flying solo. Yesterday we returned the rental car, so I dropped Jon of at work and then went to my parents. I figured it would be better that way. I had my mom get Eden and Lilah in and out from the car for me. Well Lilah can get out and in by herself, except when she’s asleep, like when we left. My shoulder did okay today while driving. On Friday, when we picked the rental car up, I had trouble. The mole they just removed is on my spine on my lower middle back, so that spot rubbed against the seat while I drove. When I shifted my body, it was then my shoulder that rubbed and was irritated. Since they’ve both healed more neither bothered me yesterday while driving.

I got two driving errands done. Instead of waiting three weeks and going next Monday to the doctor’s office for Lilah’s followup on her earache, I called and they got her in yesterday before lunch. (She could see the doctor at the two week mark so I took advantage of having the car yesterday and did it. Everything is normal and it doesn’t even look like the eardrum tore.)
I also dropped by the jewelers to get my wedding rings checked. We bought an extended service plan and they have to be checked every six months. It covers things like if the diamonds get damaged in anyway, or stolen and replaced with another diamond without our knowledge (We have a number encoded on the large diamond…well it was bought that way.), they’ll replace them for equal value, and it re-sizes the ring for free and other stuff. Well, there are two cracked diamonds in my wedding band, so I had to leave them to be replaced. I left my engagement ring also so it could get cleaned by the diamond person and polished as well. I was going to have them re-sized, but I’ve noticed I’m gaining some weight back, and I’m also afraid once I ween Eden I’ll gain a lot more. ( I really just want to stay right where I’m at.)

It was so hot driving around Vegas in the heat of the noon hour. It totally exhausted me.(Our air conditioner doesn’t cool down until you’ve been driving and not stopping, so while I waited for our Del taco, we had just gotten into the car from the jeweler’s, it hadn’t cooled down and was mostly cooler outside air. I was a little sweaty until we got onto the freeway.)
I picked Jon up from work at 5 and we came home. He made scramble eggs for dinner. I did dishes while he mowed the lawn, and he watched the girls while he watered our ever dying garden. We also did two loads of clothes. We got the girls into bed just after 9 and I fell asleep on the couch about 9:20pm. (really Eden fell asleep while I fed her at 8:15, and then Jon put Lilah in her bed after we read scriptures and said family prayer.)
I was planning on taking a quick nap. I needed to give Jon a haircut but I was too exhausted to do it just then. Jon sat next to the couch and read a little, before he fell asleep and laid down on the floor. The next thing I know it’s 11:00 pm and Jon’s turning off our living room fan so we can get into bed. I’ve just been so tired after taking the trip and having so many people over. I haven’t taken any naps, which can be good because then I go to bed on time. I didn’t sleep well while in Ely. The air mattress was better than sleeping on the floor, but it was firmer than I like it. (it was great before Jon got on it, then it became firmer with two bodies. Plus he weighs just a little more than me, so he sunk a little and I was raised a little.)
I suppose my body is adjusting to getting up at 6:45 am, because of an early riser named Eden, and not getting naps. I like to stay up late, but without naps I just can’t do it. I’m still tired in the morning. I think it’s more mental than my body not wanting to get up. Mentally I’m thinking, it’s 6:45 I am not ready to get up, even though I’ve had about 7 3/4 hours uninterrupted sleep, plus another 1 1/2 hours before I went to bed. I just don’t like the morning, but I guess I’ll have to adjust.

My week

Thursday, August 17th, 2006

Monday I was at my parents. I had the outer stitches removed and I’m still not suppose to lift for two weeks. I convinced the nurse to give me the okay for the end of this week. I figure once the outer stitches are healed then I can do some minimal lifting. I just need to put Eden down for her nap and take her out and then putting her up in her high chair. I figure that it’s mostly for aesthetic reasons, so I’m okay with a scar. It’s on a hard to heal spot with it being right under my should blade. The physician’s assistant also told me that I’ve stretch it a little bit. To not lift my kids is like telling me not to blink. It’s such a natural instinct to do things that it makes it hard not to. Not to mention I still nurse Eden and when I switch sides I have to lift her some. I guess I’m just done with relying on others. I want to do things for myself. I hate relying on others. I hate that I have a small pain in my shoulder right now telling me to take it easy. Everyone has been so helpful and I’m so grateful to have the assistance, but I just want to be on my own. I want to give Jon a rest from doing things, and I want to give my house a good cleaning. I just want to be me. ( I don’t usually keep my house spotless or anything. I live in organized chaos. But I hate that our floors need to be mopped, the tub scrubbed and it’s been so hard to keep up with dishes.)

I had my friend Danielle over on Tuesday. We had the AC technician coming over, so we stayed here all day. ( We had two parts that needed replacing. It cost way too much, but now were on a plan to have them check the ac twice a year, have the diagnoses visit be only $20, compared to $70, and we get a 20% discount on the repair costs. I thought it was worth it.) Danielle and I watched the movie Charly while the girls were down and we cried for the last half hour. She blamed hormones, because she’s pregnant, I blamed the fact that a young mother dies of cancer, and I often worry about leaving my children behind. It was nice to have her here to help.

We went to her house on Wednesday so she could get chores done and what not. She’s a kindergarten teacher so she had all sorts of interesting things for Lilah to play with and to watch. Lilah had a ball. Eden liked their dog as long as she was behind the child gate in the kitchen. It even sounded like she said doggy a couple of times. We also discovered that she has two more bottom teeth coming in, so soon she’ll have eight teeth.

Today Barbara came over to help. She had to pick up Scott so she left after Eden went down for her nap. I figure I can get her out.

I really just want life back to normal. I want to hold Eden without asking for someone to hand her to me. I want to run and help Eden catch her big sister. I don’t want to remind my girls to not hang on my right shoulder. I want to roll around and play with Lilah.

Tomorrow we go to Ely for the weekend. Evidently we’re turkey worthy since Brien and Andrea are getting the turkey out for us to have for Sunday lunch. (Brien bought a turkey for family visits.) I can’t wait to see her. Lilah was wanting to go today. She kept asking us when we were leaving, if Barbara was coming, and then if Carolyn was coming.

Fun stuff going on

Saturday, August 12th, 2006

Eden is standing by herself for long periods of times, and feeding herself with a spoon, well mostly. She does pretty good with things like applesauce. For her cheerios she uses her spoon and then her fingers. She’s getting more coordinated and it’s fun because this frees up time for me.
The other day we put the phone book on one of the chairs for Lilah ad now this is her spot. I think if we took it away without replacing another chair with the booster seat she’d get mad. Before she would sit in the high chair and we would push her up to the table. One good thing about it is now we can all eat at the same time and Eden won’t need to be in the excersaucer that gets oh so gross after a few days. I try to wipe down between meals and I wash the seat, but with her feeding herself it’s much more messy.

Today our air went out for a short while. It just stopped blowing cold air. We were getting ready to go and had turned it off, when Jon decided to try one more time. So far it’s work liked normal. The funny thing is we forgot to renew our home warranty, so we’ll be responsible for the whole bill. Now we pay a front fee of 400 or so dollars a year and then we pay a service fee of $55, it was $45 last year, per incident. When we had to get our toilets fix, the plumber came out three times, but it was only $45 because it all dealt with the same problem. It kinda sucks, but if it comes to be $475 or less, then I think we’re lucky. Really I only wanted the Home warranty in case of large problems, like the AC breaking. Since we defaulted they would start it but we wouldn’t be able to put in a claim for 30 days. So we probably aren’t going to get it again. It’s really just insurance, for the in case something major happens. I felt like we should have renewed it because our AC is original, which brings it to 20 years old. Oh well. You live you learn. We’re having him come out on Tuesday, unless it breaks before then. We’d rather have it fixed before it completely breaks, I don’t want to be stuck at the house and have it go out again. That would no be fun.

Herrin twins

Friday, August 11th, 2006

I just watched a little segment of two girls who were conjoined at the abdomen on 20/20. I was teary eyed all the way threw. It’s an LDS family, and I can’t imagine what they’ve gone threw. The two girls are the sweetest, Kendra and Maliyah I want to out up the families website, just so others can read about them. Here’s the link to the 20/20 bit on them. It really is amazing to see this families faith. They didn’t separate the children because one would need a kidney, and she needed to be older . I just wanted to write a little about them. I hope the girls recover well.

School smooll

Wednesday, August 9th, 2006

So my last semester starts in 19 days…yikes. I still need to finish filling out my FAFSA. (I started it but I needed some info, and now that I know the info I haven’t finished it.) I don’t expect as much money since last year was our first year of having income without any unemployment. I suppose it’s good because it’s my last semester, and we are doing better now. I’ll get my scholarship and then tuition reimbursement. Those should cover most of the cost. The FAFSA just gives us extra money to help towards bills, say a mortgage. I should have Jon buy my books before it gets too close to the semester and all the good used ones are gone. I think I’ve decided to drop my Music class- British invasion, music of the Beatles. Only nine people are registered including me, so I’m wondering if they’ll just cancel it. It’s also on campus. I’m thinking of keeping my CRJ 302- Quantitative App class. I really don’t know why. It’s a hard course, the teacher is difficult, but if I drop it I’ll need to get written permission to take my CRJ seminar class on Sexual offenders. (The seminar’s prerequisites are CRJ 301 and CRJ 302- I don’t need 302 to graduate, so I didn’t take it.) I need one upper division CRJ course to fulfill my minor requirements. So I have to take one or the other. So I could take the hard class, or I could take both, or I could try to get written permission for the seminar and drop the hard class. I don’t feel confident in my reasons for a waiver, so I’ve mostly decided to take both and try hard. Part of me wants the challenge. If I’m up for the challenge I can usually excel and do well, if I’m not then I stink…hence last semesters History of the French class. So there’s my dilemma. I also want to drop the music class because I don’t want to travel to campus twice a week at night time. Also if I can take one hard course and in return take one interesting class, then taking the hard course makes it worth it. So that’s it. I’ll be done with my education, at least for the time being, in 127 days…….. It feels good to say that.

Ruptured Eardrum

Tuesday, August 8th, 2006

Lilah got an ear infection from her cold. She was super sensitive and I accidentally kissed her one night on her ear and she sat straight up and pushed me away and wouldn’t let me cuddle with her for a while. I debated about taking her to the doctor on Monday. I knew it was an ear infection and for most ear infections they don’t prescribed antibiotics so I didn’t want to go just hear that it would need to heal on it’s own. She had a fever for 4 days and on Monday it had left. Lilah was also playing on Monday morning so I was tempted not to go. In the end I decided to go. They told me they could recommend me not coming because they had to see the ear to know what was going on. We got there and told Dr. Shane the symptoms. Along with the pains and fever there had been a large discharge of pus, I thought it was wax because it was the same color as her ear wax, but Dr. Shane told me it was pus. This was because she had ruptured her ear drum. He prescribe some medicine and I’m suppose to come back later this month. I’m relieved that I went. I didn’t want to go. I like to keep doctor’s visits to a minimum. She’s had colds for a week and I let them pass. She’s had fevers and they pass. It’s when things don’t pass and they continue on that I decide to go. I hope her little ear heals. This is her first ear infection…or should I say ruptured eardrum. She’s letting me look at her ear now and she slept in her bed the whole night last night. I was so happy to have uninterrupted sleep, but then Eden decided to wake up at 6:30 this morning, even though they went to bed late last night. I have Kelsey over today to help. I haven’t thought past Wednesday, but I may go to a friends house or my mom’s.

onto the fourth day

Saturday, August 5th, 2006

Lilah started getting sick on Tuesday and Wednesday Jon stayed home with us. We spent Wednesday night at my parents house so he could go to Reno Thursday morning and we wouldn’t have to be dropped off at 6:00 am. I had given my friend Barbara the option of not coming so her little boy wouldn’t get sick again. So Thursday was a grumpy day. First Jon, Lilah and I shared the daybed and trundle that’s in my parents downstairs. Lilah being sick woke up a lot and that meant we woke up a lot. When Jon got up at 5:30 am to have breakfast she decided she wanted breakfast and to be up. I was grumpy and wanted to make her stay in bed because it wasn’t time to be up, but her dad gave her breakfast and watched her. We gave him a hug goodbye and Lilah went to the couch. Honestly I don’t know when she fell asleep because I went back to the room. Eden also had a hard time getting to sleep that night. She didn’t like it when Grandma first tried to put her in a playpen in their room, and for the rest of the night didn’t like to be left alone with grandma. We sang to her and what not until she finally fell asleep in Grandma’s arms. I guess she wasn’t too happy in the morning either when it was grandma who got her. She eventually got over the trauma and Friday she was okay with Grandma putting her down for her naps.
Thursday Lilah was sick, and she started having a fever that evening. She still has a fever and it’s now Saturday. It’s been high and low. She complains of her ear at times and I’ve tried to keep her hydrated. She isn’t wanting anything though. What to do with a child who doesn’t eat or drink much. Yesterday I let her eat goldfish crackers because it was the only thing she would eat. She also had a cup or two of orange juice. It’s been tough. I figure I’ll call Monday of she still hasn’t gotten over this fever. She’s just never been sick this long. Usually it’s a day or two and then she’s on the mend. Now it’s day four and still sick. It’s just hard on a mom.

We were at my mom’s because she has no young children. Had Lilah not been sick we would have gone to the Lee’s on Friday, but I didn’t want the kids bugging her to play and what not. She was grumpy enough at my mom’s house.

Now I need to prepare my Sunday school lesson. I just need to get it on paper and figure out exactly how I want it to go. Sigh I best get going.