Tantrums

The girls have been acting up. Well, really whining up. It’s been gradual, but ever since the Ely trip it seems to have multiplied. I’m not sure if Lilah is imitating Eden or if Eden is imitating Lilah, or if they’re both attention deprived.
Lilah has temper tantrums and gets upset at any answer that she finds to be bad. Eden cries at the drop of a hat sometimes.
It’s driving me a little nuts. Lilah I can try to reason with and talk to her about what she’s doing and helping her to recognize her negative behavior and temper tantrums. Eden it’s not so easy. She cries and it’s hard to explain to a 2 year old there are other methods of expressing herself. She doesn’t really talk that much so what other method does she have?
I’m just at odds. I made a rule today that when Lilah started throwing temper tantrums and getting upset she has to go to her room or go to time out. Whichever one just long as she understands her behavior is not acceptable. I told her and began implementing the rule after she got upset that she couldn’t eat her oatmeal. (I had tested it to see if it was still hot, and as I put it back in the freezer to cool she started shouting about being hungry and wanting to eat her oatmeal right now.) I sent her to her room but it seems that her bladder always kicks in when she gets a temper tantrum. I allowed her to go to the bathroom since I knew that she hadn’t gone, but I calmly explained the rule clearly to her about tantrums and the the consequence. I’ve mostly just been sending her and saying it’s because she’s having a tantrum, but if she calms down she didn’t always have to go to her room, especially with a bathroom break in between.
I just don’t know what to do with them. Their behaving badly with people around and I find that terrible. Not because I’m embarrassed, but because I want and would like for them to have a respect for other people. I would also like for them to behave well in general around me anytime.
Anyways, Lilah only had to go to her room once today. Partially because we weren’t home a lot and also because when she has had a negative reaction it’s less tantrum like, just a little rude, so I still need to work on it. With her less tantrum attitude I feel I can answer her calmly and then she responds calmly, where as with tantrums there’s no reasoning until you threaten with a consequence.
I know they feel as though they don’t have a lot of control over their lives. I’m sure Lilah feels controlled by me and I’m sure Eden feels controlled by Lilah and me. It’s hard work teaching your children how to communicate without resorting to just crying and being upset.

It’s going to be a semi busy week, so hopefully we can fix the tantrums.

This really is the worse they’ve ever been. My MIL even commented on how she’s never seen the girls disagree or fight over something as they had today while there. Of course they didn’t have a full on tantrum and she’s not always around because of making dinner or whatever, but the girls just feel it’s okay anywhere, any time to fight over things. Lilah is better in public, but if Eden starts it she’ll also fight over whatever it is.

It is kinda two problems, they fight over something and one or both throw a tantrum, or you give an answer they don’t like and they throw a tantrum. Eden is more of the fighting tantrum, while Lilah is more of theĀ  wrong answer tantrum.

One Response to “Tantrums”

  1. Nice neice Says:

    I know what you mean…our wild boys are either best friends or worst enemies. It gets really annoying! Ethan does that thing where he whines or throws a tantrum if things don’t go his way. I think it is hard for the oldest child because they have so much responsibility, but not much control. Hang in there, it sounds like you’ve got a good plan. Love, Shauntae