Is It Naptime Yet

I’m keeping a short journal of the work we do each day on the house for the final product. So far each day is pretty short, but today was eventful.

Monday 12-10: Got to house and water had been turned on, but back off because their was a leak. Piping from the sprinkler in the front yard had been broken off, and thus created a geyser when water is on. Jon figured out how to keep sprinklers off while having the water to the house turned on, only we then noticed another geyser from the spigot attached to the house in the back, because the valve had been broken off. We had to call the home warranty company to send plumbers to fix it. Big hole in the back of the house to properly attach and extend a pipe for the new spigot. Not sure of vandals or if someone purposely broke and took the evidence, or accidentally broke and took the evidence. There were no broken pipes or valves around either area. Keeping water turned off while we’re not at the house just in case.

Today was my first mental breakdown of the move and new house. This water problem has delayed my plans for painting and has caused an annoyance while at the house. (No toilets or ability to wash hands.) I really want to fix the house and move in but having no water meant not being able to clean properly and prep for painting. People also keep asking why I can’t paint with out water, and I want to yell at them. How they heck can I clean my rollers, any spills, or even my own self if I have no running water at the site!?! I also don’t like cleaning with cleaners if I have no place to wash my hands. Ick.

I’ll admit I am now a little scared to be there working alone, because if it was vandals or someone purposefully causing damage, I fear they’ll come back while I’m there alone. It stinks. I’ll be happy to do work when my floor guy is there with me next week.

I am grateful the front sprinkler was broken, because who knows if the water guy would have been able to observe and tell there was a broken valve in the back yard. It sucks that they’re broken, but I guess I should be happy they were both broken, and not just the back yard one.

We also put some paint samples on our walls, and did not like them. We have to choose fast because we are having someone paint the entry, and it has to be a color we’re happy with because, we’ll we’re paying someone to paint the entry. I’m also worried the color won’t go with the carpet, since we choose our carpet based on the color sample.

So excited, but so stressed.

Today we signed papers for a house. It’s been a long time since we put an offer in, and it looks like we will have a second home by the end of the week! Then we’ll have to rip out all the floors to our second home, paint nearly every wall, and put it all back together again so we can move into our second home and have it become our primary home.

I’m exhausted just thinking about it.

We are so excited to have the space, but the work ahead is daunting. We’re not fixer uppers, yet we bought quite the fixer upper. Over the coming years we’ll also have to remodel the kitchen, and both bathrooms. I am looking forward to doing everything just the way we want it, even if it takes time. That is the one benefit of having to fix it up, we get to fix it to our tastes.

The girls are excited at the possibility of new pets, chickens, and building a tree house in the back yard.
Jon is excited for his library, more garden area, and building a tree house in the back yard. He’ll also be able to bike or skateboard to work.
I’m excited to have a sewing room, a school room, and more room in general. The house isn’t huge, but it is twice the space of what we have now and big enough that we can finally have more than 2 people over at a time. I wish it had a slightly more friendly floor plan for entertaining, but in actuality we won’t be having lots of people over all the time, so the house will do it’s job nicely for our regular needs. I’m happy that we’ll have space for family to stay when they visit and that we’ll be close to my sister Carolyn. She’s the best babysitter, and aunt.

So that’s the big news for us. We are finally moving, and if Jon has his way, it will be our final move.

I think I’m a little bipolar. Some days I really, really, really want a baby. Other days, I’m like, no way do I want a baby coming and messing up our perfectly worked out life. (It’s not perfect, but a baby would sure rock the boat, and be expensive.)
Things that would be really hard with a baby:
Camping. We’d have to get a bigger car because we hardly fit everything we need in our car with a cargo top.
Sleeping. I like to stay up late and sleep in.
Sewing. In my new house, whenever we get one, I would not have a sewing room, and that’s something I’m looking forward to.
Vacations. Because of needing a bigger car, we wouldn’t be able to afford to do vacations.
Homeschooling. I have a hard enough time homeschooling, and staying on task with two children. I don’t think I’d be very consistent if we had a baby. Plus, I’d have to keep what I’m using so I can use it on our younger baby.
Babysitting. Since my daughters are older, I think it’s easier to get a sitter, or at least I feel less guilty using the same two people over and over again. Having a baby would mean we’d go out less as a couple and might actually have to pay to have someone watch my kids.
Life. In general I am just not use to having a little one that demands so much of one’s time. My girls are pretty independent. They make their first two meals of the day and even help with dinner. A baby would be really life changing.

I admit to often looking at the negative to make me happy we’re not having another child. You never know what kind of personality a new little one will have and what dynamic the child will bring to the family.Plus, I can’t control what sex the baby is, and even though Carolyn wants us to have a boy, I am in no way prepared to have a boy. While the personality and sex of the baby aren’t bad. I fear having a really rambunctious, hard to handle boy. The unknown is scary.

Over the past couple years I’ve felt very many emotions.

1. We’re having a baby once we get a bigger house. No matter what.
2. Babies are way too much to handle. I’m too selfish.
3. I’m not having any more babies so lets get rid of all the baby stuff, and my maternity clothes.
4. I’d probably let Lilah or Eden do all the work of taking care of the baby, and that’s just wrong.
5. Babies are so dang cute, and mine are so big.
6. Babies are way annoying, especially as they turn into toddlers.
7. I just want to be pregnant. Who cares if I keep the baby afterwards.
8. I’m good with my little family.

I think I’m mostly baby hungry right now because of a blog I read. The woman has two daughters, one a year older than Lilah, and one who is Eden’s age. Since we both had two daughters, I really related to some of the things she went through, even though our lives are so different. She wasn’t able to have kids for a while, and yesterday she gave birth to a third little girl. Reading her posts about all her preparations and the cheerful anticipation her family felt, really got my womb wanting a another child, especially since she had a little girl.

Even now, I’m not completely sure how I feel about another child, but I’m happy that I feel joy for this mother with her new baby, not jealousy.

Today, I am happy with my family and I’m happy for the moms who have little ones to enjoy.

What I do look forward to is being in the nursery at co-op in the Fall. I really like playing with the little ones, and then sending them to their moms when they’re too upset or need a diaper change.
Then I’m like, “Baby, baby, who wants this baby?”
Not me.

So it’s half way through January and I have yet to post anything recently. I’m sure it’s not a big surprise, since I’m not very consistent.
Here’s what been going on in our lives.
-Jon’s father was in the hospital earlier this month because his heart was acting up. He was there for around 3 days being monitored and I’m not sure if they figured out what happened.
-I celebrated New Years on the strip with Sam. Matt helped her win tickets to Stevie Wonder, her favorite musician of all time. Since Matt doesn’t like staying up late, let alone staying up late on the Vegas strip in a room full of people, Sam invited me. Our girls had their sleep over a little early and on New Years Eve Jon had fun being with the girls and staying up late while I partied with Sam.
-We put Lilah and Eden in two local girl scout troops. They’re sister brownie and daisy troops, so for the most part they meet at the same school at the same time, but do not do the same things.
-We’re selling cookies, so if you’d like to buy, and we haven’t called you, let me know.
-We were this close to booking our amazing 10 year anniversary trip for an Alaskan cruise, then I decided we should buy a house instead. So we’re trying to buy a house, and yes there is a specific one.
-We’re trying to get the girl’s bathroom fixed so we can rent this place out. There are other things that will need to be done, but that’s top priority. Yeah, I didn’t want to fix up the bathroom just to leave, but that’s probably what’s going to happen.
-Getting a bathroom fixed is expensive.
-Buying a second house is expensive and scary.
-I’m hoping we’re better at fixing the next house. We’ll have to be and I think we will because the current home-owners have very different tastes than we do. Jon doesn’t agree to painting a room till we know how we’re decorating, so it will be interesting living there for the next year or so before we have money to do stuff and buy certain furniture pieces, like a couches and a new computer desk.
-Jon and I started a month of dance lessons. We’ve only taken one salsa dance class, and only danced with one another for 5 minutes, since they have you change partners, but it was tons of fun. When the girls are old enough to stay home by themselves, we might consider taking them again. For babysitting, I’ve bartered making 5 toddler dresses for my friend’s daughter’s wedding. Since I’m bartering, I don’t feel like I’m taking total advantage of a friend twice a week for a few hours each night.
-Our home-schooling co-op begins on the 23rd. I’ll be teaching chemistry. I’m a little nervous, especially since we might be moving during co-op. Chemistry is also really intimidating to me. I’m not sure what we’re doing, and the other teacher and I have just a week to figure things out. Yeah, we might be cutting it just a little too close. (We have idea’s, but haven’t hashed anything out.)

I wrote this Sunday night. I am now feeling 100% better, except my back aches from truffle and popcorn making. (32 batches down, only 20 more to go.)

I’m sure many people are rather busy in December. We are no different. Then you toss in random illnesses, and you have a pretty full month!

Last week was our busiest week. We had something. every.single.day. I did opt out of one activity, to give me some sanity.

Sunday: Church and a Christmas Performance at Anna’s church.
Monday: Last Day of Co-op and the family night performance for the co-op.
Tuesday: Cleaning of my home and not attending enrichment. (This was not so much cleaning as trying to put out fires around my messy house.)
Wednesday: Put lights on house, more stuff and Achievement Days for Lilah.
Thursday: Homeschool Christmas Party, caroling at convalescent home, and Lacey’s Choir concert.
Friday: Primary program practice.
Saturday: Ward Breakfast, Science Saturday, horseback riding lessons, and Lacey’s Mom’s night out.
Sunday: Church, but it was the Primary Program.

I know other people are just as busy, or more so, but I wasn’t feeling well, so it threw a wrench into everything I did. I’d take medicine, feel better, then the next day still be sick, but depending on the day, I’d have to take medicine to get through it, like my concert.

We haven’t put our Christmas tree up, but that’s because I’ll be making popcorn and truffles this week, and have yet to have time to sufficiently clean my home. We might get it out Saturday, and up sometime next week, which would be nice seeing Christmas is only 14 days away! When we were in school I’d complain about getting the tree up so late because it just was not possible before finals, then we needed to recoup and clean a little. Now I’m just too dang busy, or we need that little bit of extra space till I make and deliver 52 batches of white chocolate covered popcorn. (17 are for Jon, 35 are orders.)

I also have to start preparing my ‘not sure what science class I’m teaching’ for co-op, get registrations done, and accounts in order by January 1st because we start January 9th. Ick. I really have no idea what I’m teaching yet, and it’s rather stressful.

A while back I was cleaning my house, no really, I did and now I’ve stopped cleaning, it’s just easier that way, and I came across stuff I had borrowed, but hadn’t returned. I moved it to a cupboard we have right by our door, and have returned most of it, but there are a few things I’ve yet to give to their rightful owners. (Sadly, they all belong to family members.)

I’m thinking we’ve all had moments like this, where we borrow something, and due to either knowing the person, or it never being convenient to return, we held onto it a little longer than we should have, or maybe we just plum forgotten. Then we sheepishly return it because we borrowed that book over a year ago, or maybe the person even called to ask for it back, and you felt so silly hanging onto it because you had finished using it weeks, or even months, ago.

Speaking of forgetting, I was an air head twice last week, two days in a row, and for both I was supposed to have been giving service.

The first: I was supposed to pick up peaches for me and a friend. They’re from a farmer in Utah, and they do drop-offs at a local chapel that happens to be across town. She asked if I would pick them up, like three times, which should have been a huge warning sign that I had forgotten each time, and then of course, I forgot that night. It turns out it may have been a blessing in disguise, that just cost me a couple month’s allowance, because neither of us had time to can them last week, the week they came in, and now her 2 year old is super sick, and I imagine it would have been a huge burden for her. (She offered to cut me a break on the costs, but I paid her the full amount because it was my fault that we didn’t get the peaches.) I felt so bad when I realized I had forgotten and couldn’t apologize enough. It’s OK when I forget things for me, but you hate when you forget for someone else.

Fail one.

Second: I was asked to make dinner for a single sister in our ward who had back surgery. I put it on my google calendar, and thought I had set it to remind me through e-mail, but apparently had not. I totally forgot till I was reading a blog about a woman bringing dinner for a friend who was sick. I called her at 8 o’clock that night to make sure she had enough food, and fortunately her sister had been helping her and she was fine. I once more felt so terrible, even more so because I had woken her up.

Fail two.

Of course, we have times where we get things back to someone on time, and we’re able to give service because we don’t forget, but it stinks when we don’t.

For my numerous years as a stay-at-home mom, I’ve only had a car for about half of them. The first few years I stayed home all day, every day, except when my good friend Marcie came and rescued me about once a week or every other week. I had school to keep me busy and a church calling, but I was home for most of my life then, except in the evenings when I would finally get to run errands.

As time has gone on, I have a car, and depending on the time of year or what we’re doing, I’m gone for 3-4 days of the week, and always busy, and my house is always mess. I would go on cleaning spurts, the kitchen and the living room would look great, and I might even get the girl’s room organized, but there was always a mess somewhere else in the house. (My bedroom was not listed, so this is one place that is always crazy.)

Life hasn’t changed much, but what I’m realizing is I need a schedule and I need to stick with it, and in the past I’m not very good at schedules, or at least making myself stick to ’em. (Hence the most consistent at being inconsistent award in my previous post.)

I don’t know what it is, I just don’t like schedules, unless it’s full of only things I want to do, and that usually does not mean housework or exercise, though I’m finding a little more joy in the later.

With my new goal of being a consistent homeschooling parent, I’ve realized I need a house cleaning schedule, because my days are getting pretty full, especially since I love to sleep in and stay up late doing nothing of importance, and house cleaning is last on my list.

I tried really hard to put some order to our house before I started school, and that’s why we started a week late. Over the summer our home became very full of stuff, and even though I’ve recently given away tons of baby clothes and plan on getting rid of a crib and a few other things, we acquired a ton of camping gear, lots of books, food storage, and recently some dutch ovens and frying pans, which came in a handy wooden chest, it’s where to put the thing. Plus, Jon did some house cleaning of his own, and our hallway has items that use to be in our closet.

What I’m getting at is: My house is crazy, and every time I make a dent, some other area overflows with items that need a new place because I decided I didn’t like where they were, and within a week the organized room/space is no longer organized.

It’s exhausting and somewhat discouraging. I may be on the Internet a little more than needed and stay up late watching Netflix because I’m avoiding these areas. Also, I’ve just gotten use to things being in not good areas, like our hallway.

In my effort to be a little better about my home, I’m trying to allot some time on Wednesday and Friday morning, my only two mornings without something scheduled, since my afternoons are full of school, and writing blogs about how overwhelmed I am.

Today I decided to clean. But get this. I cleaned my bookshelf! Well one of the 6 we have in our house, but with cleaning it I also cleaned in front of it, which still has stuff, that I need to find a new home for.

Yeah, I’m really wise in how I use my time. I’ll let you know when I get my act together. I do plan on mopping my floors tonight, since I finished my series on Netflix and I there is little on there that interest me now.

So the best way to get me to do anything: Make my life boring as heck, but even then I’ll probably find something else to do.

I’m off to clean some other random place in my home, like the hall closet, but it really does need to be organized once more, since I have items I need to put in there, that no longer fit. It’s just, what will I take out of the closet that will need a new home, and where will that item live till I find a good spot for it?

Blah.

Here’s the mail it never fails, it makes me want to wag my tail and yell MAIL!

I no longer have a preschooler, and I only watched that show when I was at my parents, because we don’t have cable, but it was my favorite thing. I loved that show. (Blues Clues just in case you don’t know the song.)

Well, checking the mail is a fun thing in our house. The girls love to check the mail, and a couple years ago we think Lilah left Jon’s house keys in the mail box, which caused me to be really freaked out as I waited for a locksmith to come change our lock that afternoon. So now we’re pretty careful and make sure we get the keys back in our hands.

Anyways.

On Saturday Lilah checked our mail. As she came back into the house she was so excited. “There was only one piece of mail and it’s for me!” Receiving mail is few and far between for our children, so I thought it interesting and checked the return address. It was only the address, no business name, and it had “Return Service Requested.” Odd I thought, and Jon and I both gave each other questioning looks like, “Who is soliciting our kid?”.

Lilah teared it open with glee and Eden patiently looked on and asked what it was. “Hey, there’s another envelope,” which she promptly threw to the floor as she tried to get to the letter’s contents. Then she looked at the letter with a puzzled face, and I hopped over to read it.

It started off:

Account#:***********
Las Vegas- Clark County Library

Total Due: $220.26

We have made attempts to contact you about the lost materials and/or outstanding fines on your library account and have received no response.

“Oh, crap!” I think. The library books that we checked out earlier in the year, and I had just thought a couple weeks earlier, that I needed to return, had finally come to haunt me.

The letter went on, if we returned them, the fees would be removed, but we’d have to pay a $10 collection agency fee.

So I jumped in my car and went straight to the library with the 8 books.

I joked that I had received the “letter of shame” and one of the clerks responded, “Oh you received one of our death threats.” I returned the books and paid the fee on Lilah’s account. Supposedly everything is taken care of, but I can’t help but fear that I’ve really ruined something for her. Like there will be a note that this person has a tendency to not return books on time. Or as Jon pointed out, the collection agency’s fee will be on someone’s record. Just what a momma wants to hear.

Anyways, I’ve never been so happy to pay a fee at the library and will never hold onto books for so long, or better yet will return or renew them so they’re not late. It’s true that there is no late fee on children’s books, but that doesn’t mean you can keep them forever.

They will come after you.

It’s funny to try to sum up my life for the past ten years. In all honesty 10 years is more than a third of my life, and it just happens that the last ten years have, and will probably be, some of the most eventful ten years of my life, at least I kinda hope my life is a little calmer for the next decade.

To start out with ten years ago I was still in high school, still writing my missionary and envisioning some happily ever after. I was enjoying my final 6 months of my final year in high school, dating, singing, and hanging out with friends. I began working at the law office my mother had been working at, and took over her position when she left. There I met one of my longest lasting friends, but wouldn’t know it till 10 years later.

I had met Jon Blake, but he was just some old guy that I saw at the LDS Institute, in fact he was Little Jon, due to being only 5’6″ and then there was Big Jon, who was much taller.

I graduated from high school and thus began my first summer of freedom, and ironically, my last also. I enjoyed institute classes and meeting boys, flirting, and then registering for my first college classes. I applied to only one school and attended UNLV.

I began school already dating Jonathan Blake and became engaged to him very shortly after. We had a longer than normal engagement, at least by LDS standards, of 5 months. He was no longer “Little Jon” and my missionary was Dear Jon-ed just six months before he was to return home. I thought I was so mature, but I now know I wasn’t.

Marriage happened, and so did the first apartment.

I’ve lived in four different places. We’ve bought our first house and bought a second car together. I’ve been laid off of work once and held two jobs. Jon’s had four different jobs, eight different positions, been unemployed, underemployed and is now the soul provider in such a way that it would take me another decade to match his worth. We both graduated with our bachelors degrees, and Jon nearly obtained his Master’s in this same decade. ( May, in May he’ll be done!)

I became a mother.

I went through my first pregnancy and gave birth to a healthy baby girl. I picked the name Lilah, and Jon could only say yes to his just-given-birth-to-her-first-baby, baby’s mama when I said, “She looks like a Lilah,” though now we both believe it. (He’s still partial at Aliyah.)

I had two teeth removed, wisdom, and then Jon accepted his first position at UNLV, and has been there ever since.

We were then blessed with a second daughter, who’s name Jon chose and I approved, Eden. We’ve had several nieces and nephews born to our siblings, not to mention the additions of brother and sisters-in-laws.

We’ve traveled to Utah countless times. I learned where Ely, Nevada was, and have even visited it 5-6 times. I saw the ocean for the first time in the past decade, and was also able to show the ocean to my girls for their first time. We’ve been camping numerous times, mostly with family, and have taken the girls to Disneyland.

I’ve lost touch with friends, only to find them later due to social networking, something I hated at first. I’ve gained new friendships because of marriage and moving, strengthened my relationships with my sisters, and have come closer to one friend in a way I never would have imagined when we met just ten years ago.

I started a blog, and have neglected it.

I sang my first solo in the past decade, performed in my first play, learned to sew, and started marketing my talents.

In my marriage I’ve had wonderful highs, like getting married and having our first daughter, despairing lows, like learning my husband no longer believed in God, and wonderful mediums which allow me to stay constant in my love for Jonathan and the girls.

Yep, I think that kinda sums up the last ten years.

What has happened in the past decade to you?

I hope you all had a very Merry Christmas. As for my family we’ve been busy playing Just Dance 2 on the Wii, Apples to Apples Junior and the girls have been watching Daddy play Thief once a day, since I like to limit the time watching someone else do something.

We’ve also gotten rid of some old toys, (Hallelujah!) had lots of lazy mornings, and just enjoyed this time together. The weather is starting to turn gray and windy again, so we’re mostly staying inside. I’m looking forward to the New Year, though there is much to do.

Jon’s on vacation for a little while, and it’s been lots of fun to leave the house freely without having two girls attached to my hip. I rather like them, and most who I visit ask where the girls are, (Am I not cute enough?) but it’s also nice to be alone and able to take my sweet time, or run several errands without having someone ask if it’s the last place, or whine because I added one more stop.

2010 has blown by and it looks like it might leave with a bang! Bring on 2011!